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jokes
- Thread starter oilycreek
- Start date
Or Clever Dick.
My absolute favorite joke of all time:
Girl walks into a grocery store and proceeds to buy:
1 apple
1 pear
1 banana
1 cucumber
1 tomato
1 slice of cheese
1 slice of ham
1 bun
1 bottle of water
1 diet soda
1 yogurt
She takes it all to the checkout.
The guy at the cash starts ringing up her groceries. He looks at them, looks at her, looks at them again then says " you're single, aren't you?"
She says "yes. Did you get that from my shopping?"
He shakes his head.
"oh, is it because I don't have a ring ? on my finger?"
He shakes his head again.
"well then, I have to know, how did you know that I'm single????"
He looks her in the eye and says -
"'cause you're Fu**ing UGLY!"
Sent from my Nokia Lumia 625 Windows Phone using Tapatalk
Girl walks into a grocery store and proceeds to buy:
1 apple
1 pear
1 banana
1 cucumber
1 tomato
1 slice of cheese
1 slice of ham
1 bun
1 bottle of water
1 diet soda
1 yogurt
She takes it all to the checkout.
The guy at the cash starts ringing up her groceries. He looks at them, looks at her, looks at them again then says " you're single, aren't you?"
She says "yes. Did you get that from my shopping?"
He shakes his head.
"oh, is it because I don't have a ring ? on my finger?"
He shakes his head again.
"well then, I have to know, how did you know that I'm single????"
He looks her in the eye and says -
"'cause you're Fu**ing UGLY!"
Sent from my Nokia Lumia 625 Windows Phone using Tapatalk
I hope your daughter don't read that in the next few years
Ah, lucky for me, two boys.
But, that's not the values that I am teaching them. But that's another thread.
Dems just jokes, brah!
My pleasure. Stole it from a fat guy at work today. Why can't Muslims get along like this?
Dirty Frank
Well-known member
How do you milk a sheep?
Release a new iPhone
Release a new iPhone
Or give them a Lollipop.
Watching the news this morning they anounced that there are now two male birth control pills on the market. The first one is a day after pill, this pill changes your blood type. The second one you put in your shoe, it makes you limp.
A blonde walks into a library. She walks up to the librarian standing behind the counter and says "can I get a Big Mac, medium fries and a medium diet Coke please?"
The librarian looks at her, dumbfounded and says "my dear, this is a LIBRARY!"
The blonde looks around, starts to blush and says sorry. Then she looks at the librarian again and whispers "can I get a Big Mac....."
Sent from my Nokia Lumia 625 Windows Phone using Tapatalk
The librarian looks at her, dumbfounded and says "my dear, this is a LIBRARY!"
The blonde looks around, starts to blush and says sorry. Then she looks at the librarian again and whispers "can I get a Big Mac....."
Sent from my Nokia Lumia 625 Windows Phone using Tapatalk
A blonde is walking along the riverbank. She looks over the river and sees another blonde on the river's edge. She shouts "hey, how do you get to the other side of the river?" To which the second blonde responds "you ARE on the other side of the river!"
Sent from my Nokia Lumia 625 Windows Phone using Tapatalk
Sent from my Nokia Lumia 625 Windows Phone using Tapatalk
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